Kindness and Recognition

Audio By Carbonatix

How often do you do things for other people without needing recognition? Recently, I started noticing how often I do kind things for other people and then get frustrated if I don’t receive praise or am not thanked for doing them. If I let somebody merge into my lane on the highway or as they’re pulling out of a parking lot, I expect them to acknowledge me with a wave. If I hold the door open for somebody behind me as I enter a building, I expect them to thank me. If I offer somebody some helpful advice, I expect them to listen and then apply that to their lives. And I’m guessing that you probably feel the same way I do about each of these things.

But I’m learning just how important it is for me to stop doing the things I do in order to get recognition. If I’m only willing to share my advice or let somebody merge in front of me because of what I’m expecting to get back from them in the form of appreciation, I completely have the wrong perspective. When I’m doing the things that I do because I’m seeking external praise and affirmation, I’m only setting myself up for failure and disappointment. Instead, I need to have a mindset of generosity when I’m offering my acts of kindness and service to other people.

When I make that shift, it doesn’t mean that I don’t enjoy being appreciated. But it means that my motivation has changed from seeking the other person’s response to doing the act of kindness or the right thing because it’s the right thing. The real key is that we need to learn that and start practicing it so that we can teach our kids and grandkids this lesson. They need to learn the lesson that the accomplishment of what you did to make a difference is what’s significant. The key isn’t how other people do or don’t respond; The key is that you do the right thing for the right reason.